i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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