I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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