In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
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