Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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