carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
