grandma shit on top of the toilet
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
