Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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