i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
