If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
