Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
