All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
