I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
and you fell through a lawn chair
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