On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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