That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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