She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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