new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
