naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
