he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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