things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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