Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
