Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
