u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize