i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
