Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
