I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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