Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
