why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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