STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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