Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
