My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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