I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
