My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
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