If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Randomize
