he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize