And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
