Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
