Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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