I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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