Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept

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  (773): I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept http://tfl.nu/49pe
  Replies (10) Good night (538) Bad night (1802)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I just want to hang out with her.

  (916): View more from California

  You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.

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  (210): I just want to hang out with her. (916): You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you. http://tfl.nu/9qvp
  Replies (24) Good night (1801) Bad night (3757)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.

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  (561): Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like. http://tfl.nu/svkw
  Replies (42) Good night (2723) Bad night (896)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.

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  (718): Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen. http://tfl.nu/l1y2
  Replies (34) Good night (4592) Bad night (616)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.

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  (918): I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame. http://tfl.nu/mqw4
  Replies (12) Good night (3783) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral

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  (954): so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral http://tfl.nu/k9rx
  Replies (31) Good night (4562) Bad night (586)
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  (+47): View more from Norway

  i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls

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  (+47): i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls http://tfl.nu/1fkx
  Replies (48) Good night (10607) Bad night (1091)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.

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  (907): You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink. http://tfl.nu/mebb
  Replies (29) Good night (4362) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  there are ass prints on the hood of my car.

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  (601): there are ass prints on the hood of my car. http://tfl.nu/hwv7
  Replies (10) Good night (3038) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD

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  (516): i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD http://tfl.nu/cfey
  Replies (5) Good night (2046) Bad night (859)
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  (805): View more from California

  How much is that going to cost?

  (1-805): View more from California

  A lot of beer.

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  (805): How much is that going to cost? (1-805): A lot of beer. http://tfl.nu/syqn
  Replies (3) Good night (1665) Bad night (543)
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  (408): View more from California

  So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl

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  (408): So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl http://tfl.nu/o5bm
  Replies (8) Good night (2188) Bad night (470)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.

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  (904): I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing. http://tfl.nu/6kf7
  Replies (2) Good night (575) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently

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  (917): his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently http://tfl.nu/j5yc
  Replies (7) Good night (502) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!

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  (443): Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch! http://tfl.nu/w5ox
  Replies (2) Good night (540) Bad night (258)

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