I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
