Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
