Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
