This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
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