that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
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i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
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Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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