Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Randomize
