haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize