You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
