are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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