Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
false alarm. still invincible.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
