Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
