Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
